When people talk about finding and keeping the partner that they truly want to spend their lives with, the discussion invariably gets around to the topic of "soul mates."
We talk about the soul mate spark because that's what we think people are really looking for--that special feeling of connection, like you've "come home," like you never want to part.
While many people do find this in a partner, including us, there are some pitfalls around the whole soul mate mystique.
One of those pitfalls is the belief that soul mates don't have conflicts and no major issues to work through. They have pure bliss all of the time.
We wish this were true but it just isn't for most of us.
This belief is why some people get so upset and disenchanted when they find that perfect someone who they think is a soul mate and it turns sour after a few months or even weeks.
It turns out that there are things about their soul mate that drive them crazy. There are conflicts and the specialness just seems to have disappeared.
Our take on soul mates is a little different from the mystique and it may help you make more sense out of the whole soul mate and relationship thing.
We believe that there are many soul mates out there for different times in our lives and they come into our lives not only to bring us greater joy but to help us with our personal and spiritual growth.
A soul mate agrees to walk with you for awhile to learn and also teach. A soul mate relationship is a spiritual bond and the challenges that come up are the soul lessons that you have agreed to learn together.
We also believe that just as your various soulmates can enter your life "for a time, a reason or a season"-- we also believe that soul mates can part when there's no more growth and learning.
Before you think we've gone a little to far "out there" or "woo-woo" with this one. consider this...
Regardless of the kind of relationship you're talking about, if the relationship is truly close and connected-- there's a certain spiritual quality to them. Soul mate kind of relationships are no different.
It's been our experience that when two people come together and it feels like a soul mate kind of experience, it can feel like destiny or some sort of divine intervention has been gifted to you or interceded on your behalf.
So what's the soul mate spark?
It's that spark of desire to draw closer and connect with a love and passion that keeps growing throughout the years.
Is it possible?
We know it is because we and others have it--and we also believe that you can create it.
Here are a few ways...
We talk about the soul mate spark because that's what we think people are really looking for--that special feeling of connection, like you've "come home," like you never want to part.
While many people do find this in a partner, including us, there are some pitfalls around the whole soul mate mystique.
One of those pitfalls is the belief that soul mates don't have conflicts and no major issues to work through. They have pure bliss all of the time.
We wish this were true but it just isn't for most of us.
This belief is why some people get so upset and disenchanted when they find that perfect someone who they think is a soul mate and it turns sour after a few months or even weeks.
It turns out that there are things about their soul mate that drive them crazy. There are conflicts and the specialness just seems to have disappeared.
Our take on soul mates is a little different from the mystique and it may help you make more sense out of the whole soul mate and relationship thing.
We believe that there are many soul mates out there for different times in our lives and they come into our lives not only to bring us greater joy but to help us with our personal and spiritual growth.
A soul mate agrees to walk with you for awhile to learn and also teach. A soul mate relationship is a spiritual bond and the challenges that come up are the soul lessons that you have agreed to learn together.
We also believe that just as your various soulmates can enter your life "for a time, a reason or a season"-- we also believe that soul mates can part when there's no more growth and learning.
Before you think we've gone a little to far "out there" or "woo-woo" with this one. consider this...
Regardless of the kind of relationship you're talking about, if the relationship is truly close and connected-- there's a certain spiritual quality to them. Soul mate kind of relationships are no different.
It's been our experience that when two people come together and it feels like a soul mate kind of experience, it can feel like destiny or some sort of divine intervention has been gifted to you or interceded on your behalf.
So what's the soul mate spark?
It's that spark of desire to draw closer and connect with a love and passion that keeps growing throughout the years.
Is it possible?
We know it is because we and others have it--and we also believe that you can create it.
Here are a few ways...
1. Make a soul mate commitment.
Commit the time and the energy to growing your passion and love for each other. Even 10 minutes a day of true
connection can help rejuvenate a relationship that was once close and now seems disconnected.
2. Kindness matters
We have often seen partners in committed relationships treat each other with less respect than they do strangers.
Take a fresh look at how you treat those closest to you and treat them as the special soul partners that they truly are--with kindness and respect.
3. Be curious about yourself and your mate.
When you find yourself being triggered by your partner or the people closest to you, take a moment and get curious
instead of reacting. It's easier said than done, we know, but just try it.
Get curious enough to just listen to find out what's truly going on between you. Listen to what's underneath the
disturbance. What want, need or desire is trying to be expressed for both of you? Listen from your heart.
4. Make one small shift.
Ask yourself these questions--"What do I want?" "What do I care about right now?" "Do I want to be right or do I want connection?"
What actions or words will bring you closer to rather than further from what you want and what you care about?
One small shift, like simply pausing before you email someone in anger, can make a big impact on your relationship and can make the difference between keeping your spark alive and letting it die over time.
We all choose our partners for different reasons and some we consider our soul mate and some not.
If you want to keep, grow or rekindle the spark between you, start doing a few things each day to nurture it.
If you aren't currently with any one you consider to be a soul mate, you might begin practicing as if he or she is with you in the form of the people who are in your life right now.
Commit the time and the energy to growing your passion and love for each other. Even 10 minutes a day of true
connection can help rejuvenate a relationship that was once close and now seems disconnected.
2. Kindness matters
We have often seen partners in committed relationships treat each other with less respect than they do strangers.
Take a fresh look at how you treat those closest to you and treat them as the special soul partners that they truly are--with kindness and respect.
3. Be curious about yourself and your mate.
When you find yourself being triggered by your partner or the people closest to you, take a moment and get curious
instead of reacting. It's easier said than done, we know, but just try it.
Get curious enough to just listen to find out what's truly going on between you. Listen to what's underneath the
disturbance. What want, need or desire is trying to be expressed for both of you? Listen from your heart.
4. Make one small shift.
Ask yourself these questions--"What do I want?" "What do I care about right now?" "Do I want to be right or do I want connection?"
What actions or words will bring you closer to rather than further from what you want and what you care about?
One small shift, like simply pausing before you email someone in anger, can make a big impact on your relationship and can make the difference between keeping your spark alive and letting it die over time.
We all choose our partners for different reasons and some we consider our soul mate and some not.
If you want to keep, grow or rekindle the spark between you, start doing a few things each day to nurture it.
If you aren't currently with any one you consider to be a soul mate, you might begin practicing as if he or she is with you in the form of the people who are in your life right now.
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